Tuesday, January 24, 2012

2012 and a personal update

Ok...so I haven't posted much since the change of the year.
Yesterday was the Chinese New Year, entering the Year of the Water Dragon. I'll do a separate post about that one in a bit.

So far this year has been busy busy busy.

We're moving in April and are busy packing and selling what we don't need. Its a lot more work than expected.

In my love life, Damon and I are great. For those that don't know, we are polyamorous and have been looking to complete our family with a third person...sadly this has caused us a lot of agitation and heartbreak and continues to do so even today.

As far as my health goes...well its a little strange.
I am just coming off of my period...this is the second menses I've had this month! Now, I have hormone issues periodically so that's understandable but...I know of 4 other women who are also bleeding off and on all month when they normally don't. A friend said "the world is going to end with mass pms." While that is a joke it does make me wonder if the shift is causing our bodies to be confused.

I've had strange dreams as well.
One of which I was being attacked and had to help a woman, a goddess in human form, do a ritual to heal the planet. She ended up dying even as I completed the rite and tried to save her. Her blood was everywhere and the earth drank it in like a sponge.
Another, I was trying ot heal my husband with a mix of energy work, herbalism and strangely enough, Reik (I don't know anything about Reiki and only ever had 1 reiki session in my life).

I'm still taking my herbalism classes but there's this strange pull to make me go deeper into them. And I feel rushed, almost panicked sometimes.

I don't know what this year will bring but I expect big things.

Totem Animals

Alright, so this blog might be a little vague and a little lengthy...there's my warning.

The Pagan Blog Prompt was about totem animals and what they have taught you...wow, what a subject. Whole books are written about these things.
-takes a deep breath-

My main spirit guide and totem animal is a dragon. He is very hard to describe but HUGE is an understatement. When I see him in my mind's eye I feel as small as the pupil of his eye. I know that his neck is longish and slender enough for me to ride upon the nape of his neck and press my hands against the back of his head.
I do not know his name...I don't think I can pronounce it in human tongue. It starts with an Akh.

Akh came to me when I was 13 years old and needed some help physically, spiritually, emotionally. I was under attack for the first time in my life by another witch, a boy who had been studying for a couple of years longer than myself and decided to attack me when I made it very clear I had no intention of working with him or dating him.
I had no one to turn to who would not think I was crazy and I kept having dreams that he would turn into this great naga (man snake) and wrap me in his tail and crush me to death.
Then, one evening I curled up in a ball on my bed and I began to pray to whoever would listen. "Please protect me, please." The prayer slowly began to change in my head, like the words were twisting themselves without my help. Suddenly I was chanting, and I sadly never wrote this chant down nor did I ever use it after that night, so I can't share it with you but it had something about Great Dragon, wings of night then rhymed with flight and might...eh -shrugs-.

That night I had no nightmares. Instead I dreamt I was sleeping against a wall of scaled muscle, perfectly safe and warm. This went on for a week and slowly I noticed the guy who was attacking me looking very, very tired. I never asked him about what happened, but he did call me one night when a mutual friend of ours was in a car accident and in the hospital. We talked for a bit but it was very strained and unnaturally polite on his part.

As for me and Akh. I saw him more and more. Soon I was able to make out the coloring of his great body (all grey and blue and black and purple). His astral realm is dark mostly and when he shows me things its like water reflecting images.

Akh was there for me when I went to the Coptic Conference and Dick Sutfen lead us to meditate and foresee the year 2012. He protected me and assured me that I was safe even though some of the things I saw were frightening.

Something I noticed about dragons, talking to others who have them as guides, is that they sleep for long periods of time. Sometimes months, sometimes years. I always know when he's sleeping and when he is awake. When he is awake I only have to close my eyes and he's there. Even though he is large its like I can feel him inside of me, wrapped around my spine, resting in my heart, throat and third eye chakras.

Damon has met my dragon before. He was astral projecting while I slept and he said it was like a great wall of scales and then it moved and looked at him. He told Damon his name...but he too only received an Akh sound, leaving me to believe we cannot pronounce it. He said that even though the Dragon know he wouldn't hurt me, he was still protective of me while I slept and wouldn't let Damon peek in on me while unconscious.

The only other person to talk to me about my dragon was a man I worked with for a little while named Michael. He said he knew a few others with Dragon guides but few that were as big and strong as Akh. That he had once had a vision about dragons and the relaying message was that come 2012 there will be 9 and 1. Not 10 but 9 and 1. He said he normally didn't tell people about that because he didn't really know what it meant but felt that I should know and that it should mean something to me.
Strangely enough I didn't think about pagan things when I heard it but was reminded of a verse from the Bible,  Revelations about the 10 horns on the head of the beast with the little horn in the middle. It was the first thing that came to mind and still makes me curious. I'd love to know if anyone else has any clue about this from a prophetic or intellectual (and non-evangelical) standpoint.

Other than that, Akh is always with me. I feel him now even as I type. He doesn't seem to care much that I talk about him, heh.

All in the Genes

Is it all in the genes?
Well first I want to say my family is not made up of pagans or practicing witches. They're mostly Southern Baptists and Non-denominational Christians.
That being said I have inherited a lot of my interests and abilities from certain people in my family.

My Aunt Venus, who I have spoken about on here before, was a great healer in the family and used herbs and herbcraft to heal many of our family members up to the point that she died 2 years ago. Many people in my family talk about how like her I am and I love it.

I also had many many uncles who saw the dead, saw ghosts, had dreams that came true, etc. As far as I know I'm the first female in the family able to do that.

So yea i believe certain things are in the family. I don't think genes have anything to do with it. I think its how you're born into each lifetime with the same people and that develops something with them that link each other.

My husband, Damon, and his mother and his step father are powerful psychics. They can read people like most can read a book. They've also demonstrated ability in telekinesis.
Just another example of connection in families.

Sunday, January 1, 2012

Diet and the Psyche

Happy New Year!

So I'm on Day 1 of my New Years Resolutions to release weight, live healthier and change my eating habits.
The First three days I will be fasting on liquids and give myself my very first enema (I know, TMI).

I had planned on walking today but it rained so I'm reading The Secret Life of Plants, the text book for the Herbalism certification I'm doing.

I posted on my fitness blog (warning, the reason I separated this blog is because it correlates with my BDSM lifestyle, so, if You're not comfortable with me talking freely about my sexuality...you may want to veer away from reading this blog or the one corresponding to the screen name) Slave Girl Figure, about something I read in this text about how one scientist believes that diet effects psychic research and how one rich in veggies, fruit and nuts is perfect for psychic findings.
See this post HERE

I look forward to seeing how my diet changes effect my spirituality and was wondering,
those of you who are vegetarian, vegan or raw vegan, how has that effected your spiritual and magickal practices?